Shawn & Chad's House of Dad Jokes

[August West]

Why don’t they play poker in the jungle?


Too many cheetahs.

 

[Calm_Shaver]

What do you call a fish with no eyes?




Fsh.

 

[Cvargo]

What's upstairs?


Unfortunately the stairs can't talk.

 

[NurseDave]

Why isn't a Koala part of the bear family?

It doesn't meet the koalafications.


Above joke included in a shipment of hand drawn cards sent to the hospital from an elementary school

 

[August West]

Why is six afraid of seven?

Because seven eight nine.

 

[The Monkey]

Have you heard the joke about the Cornoavirus?

Never mind......you probably won't get it.

 

[ShawnF]

What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?



The wheelchair.

 

[ShawnF]

I put root beer in a square glass and all I got was beer.

 

[Spider]

My girlfriend always gets mad when I mess with her red wine…

So I added some Sprite and oranges to it and now she’s sangria then ever…

 

[August West]

 

[NurseDave]

Due to quarantine I’m only telling inside jokes.

 

[Dave in KY]

Due to quarantine I’m only telling inside jokes.

Great now we're recycling dad jokes......

 

[haggises]

So last night was watching an Australian cooking show on TV. The chef made a meringue and the in studio audience started applauding. I was shocked!


Australians usually boo meringue.

Obligatory Scottish joke.
Man walks into a baker shop and asks the baker, "is that a donut or a meringue?"
Baker replies, "No, you're right."

I'll get ma coat

 

[Spider]

Why is today (April 30th) Justin Timberlake’s favorite day?

Spoiler: Because.....

 

[ShawnF]

I was going to tell you a joke about time travel, but you didn't like it.

 

[NurseDave]

 

[BarberDave]

View attachment 24532

Border collies are my spirit animal

 

[BadgerFiend]

What did the cloud have on under her dress?



Thunder-pants

 

[BadgerFiend]

Oh and just read this cheese ball of a gem in our institution's daily safety huddle email:

What do you get when you cross poison ivy with a 4 leaf clover?





A rash of good luck

 

[Morecolor]