Well it's Memorial Day / night. Currently I am very emotional. Why did we make it but so many of our brothers didn't. I don't know what i'm doing i'm just typing as it comes out. For some reason this memorial day is tougher than usual. My chest aches it feels like it is caving in and I have a hole that is just sucking the air out of me... Why do I feel so much hurt ? Why are the tears just rolling down my face ? Forgive my language but,,,, Damn it I should be stronger !!!! We were trained to not feel like this right ?? I don't know why I am this way , Was it something I saw or was it something that happened to me ? There are some blanks in my memories , god I pray they are not because of something Horrible... Yes I know being shot was a trauma , but I remember that.. A few inches higher and I probably wouldn't be here. The door had multiple bullet holes in it that would have hit me if they had not deflected for one reason or another. then out of the vehicle and still more firing. Would it ever stop !!!!!!! That's when I was hit. I remember it. First it felt a little warm then it didn't feel like anything then a dull ache then pain.. You see those all were happening at the same time. The pain and not the pain... I stayed in. I continued on I would not break. I healed. I didn't......... I fight I'm a soldier, I do my duty until that one day,, we jump we are under fire the jump is off I don't know what's going on. I come down but my leg is in pain afterwards... Gotta move , gotta look out for my guys , but , they are looking out for me. Well full leg cast for many , many months.. Off active duty but, not the end......
okay.. I have stopped and read what I typed... there is more to this than what I have typed.. But not tonight. My little ones have school testing tomorrow morning and I have to now try to be super dad to them and if I continue here now I dont know what I can be !!!!
I am gonna post this without any editing .... This is Me.....