Whose buffet? My god he died in 44 BC and we still can't spell it! No wonder he was stabbed to death, better than learning Latin!
Nurses in those days were crap - rub olive oil on it and that'll be fine.
Wives in those days were also crap - rub olive oil on it an that'll be fine, but don't wake me up i have to be at the Senate in the morning.
Girlfriends were the business, but if they met wives that could be an issue. They'd rub you all over and sell the pictures to stone carvers of the time to make you look bad and leave the wife.
You've probably seen a lot of this spiteful Roman art where the men have little cherub penises and the Greek women did this too and try to carry on the tradition to this day.
Ouzo is not an accident.
i align more with my cats, so that's an Egyptian thing because cats were worshipped and they mine have never forgotten it.
T