Dad Jokes

[CVargo]

6/14 @NurseDave how much room is needed for fungi to grow?

Spoiler

as mushroom as possible

 

[CVargo]

6/15 @NurseDave how do you know carrots are good for your eyes?

Spoiler

have you ever seen a rabbit wear glasses?

 

[CVargo]

6/16 @NurseDave how do you make an eggroll?

Spoiler

you push it

 

[CVargo]

yesterday @NurseDave what do you call the new girl at the bank?

Spoiler

Nutella

 

[CVargo]

And finally today! @NurseDave how do you fix a broken pizza?

Spoiler

Tomato paste

 

[NurseDave]

 

[CVargo]

@NurseDave what has bread on both sides and is afraid of everything?

Spoiler

a chicken sandwich

 

[NurseDave]

 

[EMG06]

A biological anthropologist stepped up to the lectern holding the skull of an Australopithecus. What he did next…

Spoiler

was jaw dropping

 

[CVargo]

@NurseDave what did the nut say when he sneezed?

Spoiler

Cashew!

 

[NurseDave]

 

[CVargo]

@NurseDave what do you get when you step on a grape?

Spoiler

A little whine

 

[NurseDave]

 

[CVargo]

@NurseDave you know how they throw the ball into the crowd at the end of a game to celebrate?

Spoiler

can't do that in bowling. I know that now

 

[NurseDave]

 

[CVargo]

Hey @NurseDave you really gotta hand it to @BarberDave amirite?

Spoiler

becuase he can't reach it

 

[CVargo]

@NurseDave what's long, green, and slowly turning red?

Spoiler

A cucumber holding its breath.

 

[NurseDave]

@NurseDave what's long, green, and slowly turning red?

Spoiler

A cucumber holding its breath.

Wouldn’t it be turning blue?

 

[NurseDave]

 

[notveryyoung]

I love this thread!!