When I was born, my dad waited in the waiting room (it was the 60's) and when he came in the nurse asked him some questions for the birth certificate.....they asked him, is this your wife and he said yes....then they asked him, is this your son and my dad said, I've never seen him before in my life. The nurse was not amused....my mom couldn't stop laughing. True story.
FTFYChad has derailed yet again........send weak alcohol and an extraction team for @mvargo .